Last night my little kook was crying, as she does from time to time. And as it happens from time to time I knew that she was recently fed and changed and had not long ago woken up from a nap. Not hungry, not wet, not tired. I wasn’t sure what was wrong (I often wish I could read her mind…) I picked her up and just like that she stopped. She stopped crying and just started happily pointing around the room (that’s kind of her thing.) I held her for a few minutes then put her down to go use the rest room and guess what? The tears started falling anew. When I was finished I went and picked her back and, yep, you guessed it, she was happy once more. Interesting huh?
Some people would observe this interaction and think to themselves (or state out loud) “Wow. She’s pretty spoiled huh?” And I HAVE wondered before if I am spoiling her by picking her up whenever she wants to be picked up. But I think I have decided that you just can’t spoil your child by holding them. My mom has always said “the need to be held is as real a need as the need for food and water.” And I agree. As I was cuddling my daughter 3 thoughts came to mind:
1) It’s such a simple request to be held
2) I can solver her problems so easily right now. I know as she gets older this may not be the case.
3) There will be plenty of opportunities for her to learn to ‘self-soothe’. There will come a time when she won’t want to be held hardly at all. I’m going to enjoy it as often as I can for as long as I can.
And then I was the one crying.